Ever since that moment, I was feeling betwixt and between about my decision. But today, my doubts are finally gone. I came to realize it's not how much goods or bads a person has, nor how well that person is treating you that's the most important. People change, the goods you see today maybe the deal breaker tomorrow, and someone who treat you like king today can be careless about you tomorrow. So what is the most important? the answer may sound lame but I think it's Love. Forget about looks, careers, cars...all those craps. Stop being rational for a moment and just answer honestly: how much do you really love that person; and how much do you think that person really loves you. The answer can be cruel, but I think that's what only matter at the end of the day. Back to me, I think today I finally know the answer to those questions and they are 1) not enough, and 2) not much.
I indubitably can feel the disconnection lately. And when two people are just inches apart but have no communication at all, almost like trying to disguise their inner feelings. That indeed is sad, and I feel bitter for that. I realize some things really can't be repaired, trust for example, my heart is sinking right now, I can't find a word to describe...I am such a lousy boyfriend...I hate me...
But it is what it is, I truly believe God loves us all and has plan for all of us, I know we will be fine...I wish you the best...
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